Blogging isn't deck

My therapist (I don't really need one, I just set appointments with him to let my mind breathe some air) told me that starting a blog could be just as salubrious as our sessions. I don't know if I fully believe it, but I deeply revere the man so I'm going to trust his words. I don't really fancy the idea of blogging. Too many people do it, first off. And I really don't like discussing my life. But maybe this friendly self-banter in reality is what I thrive on. What others might or might not think of me could be the whole reason I am who I am. Anyway, like it really matters…

I don't know if I'm going to stick with my Facebook account. It's becoming so corporate. It's just, so many souls looking for something, keep finding themselves getting lost in it, and it's making me feel like a conformist (and dare I say addict?) to world wide web writing now. I mean, I already have, like, over 400 friends on there, and it's getting to the point where I'm full on ignoring requests. But I don't know. Maybe I'll just delete all my profile information and only leave one photo of me on there, as to keep the spirit of aloofness and detached mystery . Obviously Myspace is out of the question, you know? I mean, come on, it's had its time. Nothing but a whore pit and a slut lounge now. I use to dig up all my music through that. But now when I check up on the artists, I see they have entire throngs listening to them now, so I stopped liking those bands and started surfing on third name record labels. It's just there's sooooo much out there untapped, you know? Once you open your eyes to vinyl, new doors open. Sometimes I'll just sit and vibe out and just…. exist. Nothing sounds as REAL as music cut straight into the heart of a vinyl. And I'm so sick of the indie scene. So many venues now where a minute percentage of people might actually KNOW something about the band. A friend through a friend through a friend, you know? That's fine though, I've got my Zune. I had an iPod, but hell, everyone does. I'm not saying I traded it just because of that. It's just the buttons on a Zune are nicer and it's just seriously better. No joke.

Yesterday I was talking with my friends about bands you probably wouldn't know and we had just got a small bite to eat at Daniel's Organic Bar, and Robyn's going off on current events and shit, when I started thinking about just how much a spiritual journey we're all on. And it's good to have friends though it all, even though we don't ever really HAVE friends, just others we find on the path. And as I walked and thought about just being, I was so euphoric knowing they were thinking the same thing. But then I spilled some of my sprout and tomato sandwich on my shirt, right on the v-neck, and got the necklace I took from my grandpa's World War II military chest stained as well. The shirt was from some thrift store years back, or maybe it was like from my uncle's high school reunion, I don't remember (that's pretty much the history of all my clothes) but I got super pissed. I would've still been pissed, but this one girl I recognized from my friend's Flickr account was walking towards us. In reality, I didn't care to talk to her, cause I'm in a complicated relationship, but then I saw she had a pierced nose and she WAS uber-fashionable, so I nodded to her and she half-smiled. Turns out she wants to be a clothing designer. I've been monitoring her blog since, and she's got some stellar ideas. I have some too, but I'm seriously too busy working on some paintings and a book I plan on writing when I have more money. So little time, right? I'm just glad she came up and talked to me. She even had an iced vanilla chai tea (no worries, it wasn't Starbucks). I was slightly dazed, though, because when I'm with my crew, I worry sometimes. It's not like we're intimidating, but we probably are, a little. I see how some cats try and join our group, but seriously, since when can anyone just JOIN in, am I right? I don't ostracize, but just because I said I liked your head band doesn't mean you can just take a sip out of the Nantucket Nectars Organic Juice in my hand. And I hate it when I hear some say, "I'm with this group." We're not an effing "group".

My friend Dan bought some $100.00 Puma sneaks the other night. I let him know he's becoming a freaking conformist. I have these tennis hops I got off Rusty Zipper.com, man. No one recognizes them. Probably only exist in Sweden. I still only wear them once a week though. It's summer so I try and be barefoot as much as possible. Chelsea told me when I'm barefoot in my skinny jeans I look like Tunde Adebimpe (TVOTR [TV on the Radio] lead singer). I haven't listened to them like in a month because I've been getting new stuff, stuff you wouldn't know, but I enjoyed hearing that. Anyway, I have to part. It's been over a week, and I need to take some new Facebook profile shots, and they've got a new load of records that came in downtown (can't tell you the name of the place) and I need something new for my circa '59 record player I took from my grandmother. Maybe I'll write again, maybe not. I might have too many art projects to work on.